Thanks to all for the kind and wise responses. I realize that no contact is the only way to cope with my AD. I broke it when I texted her after her BF died and she in her manipulative brilliance reeled me in like the sucker that I still can be towards her. Her chemical madness cannot be interrupted by anyone but her. I'm so tired of banging my thick head against all the walls she's erected to keep any loving or health seeking persons from getting to her. Addiction is a true form of insanity.