"I bet if you went to that forum and asked 1000 people if any of them ever got sober because of their spouse/loved one/ significant other wanted them too, they all will say No."
"You say it NEVER works. Never is a all encompassing word. My first husband is an alcoholic. He has been in recovery for almost 30 years. If I didn't have the conversations, he would have never sought AA. So Never is not a true statement. "
I get that you feel that because of your conversations, he would never have sought AA. What I said what was "if any of them ever got sober because of their spouse/loved one/ significant". Meaning because we yelled at them, screamed at them, cried at them, begged them, threatened them. That is what I am saying. They don't get sober because we love them, they get sober because they are sick and tired of being a drunk. I hope that your boyfriend will find that peace one day. It's not easy to love an addict.