The understanding takes some learning, but in the end is quite simple. Your mind is you, you control your actions, and make the proper decisions. Your subconscious mind or "AV" is like a child throwing a tantrum to get what it wants.
Sure, you can quiet it for a little while, but then it wants more and more and more.
At the end of the day you hold all the power to say NO! and with that, the tantrums will quiet down, and you will know how to handle them.