I have to count days
I realize that when I don’t it’s because it’s “not that important”. Counting days means I notice what went into to getting them. The desperation...humiliation....I take Antabuse in front of a nurse 3 Times a week now. I pee into a cup for accountability. I agreed to get a card signed at meetings. ****, I even ask a higher power of some kind to help me. I’m desperate. I don’t have another chance. I’m done researching and rolling the dice. I cannot throw this away. Please please please. No.