No...you really don't want him back.
You have YOU.
And a glorious child.
All that can be all hers now. What a lucky gal!
I went through this exactly. I was never a drinker, he was. He went to rehab, came home and promptly divorced me. I started to drink. Bad idea. I finally quit just about 5 months ago and I honestly feel amazing.
I really loved that moron, but I was no longer in love. Now I realize that I dodged a bullet! I'm better off! Takes time, but just go through it and it will get better each day. It is ill advised to drown your sorrows, FYI. Just saying....it took me 5 years to get healthy again. Not worth the loss bug so grateful!!
You'll get there and you will see this is for the best. Forget about him and focus on you and your baby!
Big hug,
Jules