Hello mum,
I promise it does get better. I've been divorced, and even without children and active addiction involved, I cried for days when certain paperwork was signed. I think it's a normal reaction. I mean, I didn't get married to get divorced, right? It seemed like the most epic failure of my life.
But I took a lot of time to work on myself, my thought processes, and I came to a much better and happier place
I know it can happen for you, too.
Sending light and prayers to you, your kiddos, and your ex for a better future!