well... do what works for you.
what didn't work for me was trying to do it on my own.
I didn't have positive experiences with AA in the early years of my journey to sobriety either.
honest reflection showed be that the reason was I was still an active alcoholic and not ready to actually embrace sobriety.
once I did get to that stage - I still had (have) certain issues with AA that I consciously set to the side because AA's benefits as a tool in my overall recovery far outweigh the aspects that bother me.
All that said - use the tools that work for you. For ME, the tools have been many and varied. AA is among them. Therapy. Time with other sober people. Community of sobriety and recovery - all have been key. Even this forum. I'm sure I would never have succeeded on my own.
I'm sorry to hear of your experience.... that had to be a real shocker and a wake-up call. I hope you're able to fully embrace sobriety because you will find that your life is far, far better and more rewarding.