New here...day 13
I registered here a couple years ago, but quickly forgot about it. I am 30 years old, and have been struggling with alcohol for about a decade now. I have always been the type to need to drink every single night to the point of passing out, for years at a time. I couldn't go a single day without it.
A couple months ago, I decided I needed to quit, and stopped drinking. On my 30th day, I decided to drink (but not even completely *wanting* to), and since then, it has progressively gotten even worse then before. It was to the point where I was drinking all night every night, more drinking when I woke up just to make myself pass back out, and sleeping a lot of the day. Sad and scary to see what I was doing to myself. I could hardly eat anything out of pure nausea, my skin on my face had turned red and extremely dry. I was an anxious, depressed mess, and the guilt was eating me alive. I was slowly killing myself. I have 3 kids that I *need* to be there for. I cannot go back to that life again...I can't.
I am on day 13 today, and feeling good. It's so hard to grasp how energetic, guilt-free, and truly *good* I feel when not drinking...and why I would ever give up a life free from that poison, just to go back to that vicious cycle. I am hoping and working toward never touching it again...starting with a day at a time.