I'm in - a bit late but that's ok.
I used to try to comfort myself with the thought that "maybe someday" I could drink normally. I think it made it a tiny bit easier in the early days - It was so overwhelming to think that I'd never ever drink again. So I'd tell myself that maybe when I'm a little old lady I could have a little glass of wine now and then. But as time goes by - I really can't imagine why I'd want to even do that. What's the point? One little glass of wine now and then would do nothing for me. And there is no guarantee whatsoever that, even as a little old lady with a cat in my lap, a shawl, and maybe a nice little fire in the fireplace, that I wouldn't drink the whole damn bottle, get up to use the bathroom, and fall and break my hip. Alcoholism lasts forever. I truly believe that, and I don't want to test it. Ever.