"I don't know where to start in fixing anything in terms of everything that I have done. It's like a massive hoarding pile you need to sort and you just get depressed looking at everything you have to do. "
Here's where you start.....
START WITH YOU.
Don't worry right now about other people's perspective of you. Don't worry right now about the things you've done or the people who are angry with you or the 'fixing' of relationships or the illusion or 'reputation'.
Use this milestone place in your life as a turning point (BECAUSE IT IS ONE, REGARDLESS WHAT MOVE YOU MAKE NEXT).
From here, things will turn - either they'll turn better, or they'll turn worse. Plain and simple.
The best chance you have for leading the course of your life into the "Turn Better" path is to start healing yourself. Getting honest with yourself. Being the best version of yourself you can be.
If you choose right now to embrace sobriety and do everything in your power to take the right actions to honor that choice - then I promise you, your life will turn better. I promise you, the 'how do I fix this' will reveal itself.
Priority #1 - embrace sobriety
Priority #1 - honor that sobriety with SOBER ACTION
Priority #1 - complete honesty with yourself about what must change
Priority #1 - Surrounding yourself with support for the above
EVERYTHING ELSE will come in time.
