Originally Posted by Gottalife

In aa experience, leaving something out of the fifth step is one of the most common causes of relapse, probably second only to the three step, or no steps.

“The best reason first: If we skip this vital step, we may not overcome drinking.Time after time newcomers have tried to keep to them selves certain facts about their lives. Trying to avoid this humbling experience, they have turned to easier methods. Almost invariably they got drunk.”

Maybe the outlook is not as bleak as it seems. Though you may have a sponsor who insists on hearing your fifth, the big book is also adamant that it is absolutely your choice who you go to. We have to be completely honest with someone, is how it goes. Complete honesty is the requirement for the step, the someone is up to you.

As you can understand, not everyone in aa is suitable for hearing a fifth step. There is no training or direction about it in the big book. The wrong person can be an absolute disaster. I have heard a few fifths, but everyone I sponsor has a free choice. Members of the clergy are actually trained in the fifth step, and I have had 100% positive results with sponsees who chose that path. They also have inviolable confidentiality, which almost no one else has.

If you hold something back, step five will not work, and unfortunately you will never know what you missed out on. Perhaps review your position, and take it outside AA would be my suggestion.