Originally Posted by
Meraviglioso Well thank you for your words, but this ain't a competition, you know? We ALL have it hard, there are different struggles built into each particular addiction but in the end we are all struggling to beat this and do the best we can.
And no, it doesn't sound easy to just delete those numbers because I know what is behind such an act, it would be insanely difficult. But, entirely possible. I recently deleted the number of my ex-psychiatrst from my phone. He fired me back at the beginning of this year. I was absolutely crushed and have since become psychotically obsessed about the whole thing. I am a 38 year old woman and am acting like a little brat over this. But deleting his number was a big step in trying to get past this and it was incredibly freeing. I only begun making progress with the situation after I did that. He wasn't providing me drugs or alcohol, but I was acting in a needy, addictive way and cutting that link was an important step. It's not the same, I am not saying that, but I can take it further and imagine what a massive step cancelling those numbers would be for you. You can do that you know. You can. You really can. Could you do that right now? Are you willing to?
If i say no then the question would be what the hell am i doing on this site. If i say yes then id be lying. People make the mistake of thinking that this stuff has a hold on you because those people fail to consider that you are also holding onto it. It is a very deep, hard-core struggle within to 'let go of it' and also to 'let it go' like you did eith your situation.
By no means is my intention to compete. I was trying to imagine what you must feel like on a daily basis. How hard it must have been and still has to be for you. Trying to convince myself that my situation is not that bad in hopes to make it easier for me to let go.