I don't post here, but this topic made me feel something, if that makes scene... I too am a chronic relapser, but don't post about it, but slowly i am learning the last 15 years of my life is something i can't talk about and need help, somehow... so screw it to all the anxiety and depression... im just gonna say thank you to everyone here that i have read over time... I find myself reading this site more and more everyday, and keep seeing people more like myself here. Before i was in rehab, based on my work forcing me to go, which didnt work out since i screwed up and drank again... I still am drinking, but seeing this really encourages me not just to stop (i already want to do that)... but everyone here has helped overall just to reassure me that im not alone, which in my head is a huge thing since i live alone and don't have anyone to go to. Anyway, ill stop rambling, best wishes to everyone out there struggling.