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Old 10-06-2017, 11:01 PM
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sweetichick
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Join Date: May 2016
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,802
In a black mood. Bought 2 bottles.

I really don't know what is wrong with me today. I know I am really anxious about the upcoming car repayment. My neighbour is still treating me like shift. I haven't been to AA yet. Always too scared to show up. Just feel enveloped in a cloud of doom. I need to write a will and my daughter can't even bother to get back to me about leaving her my car. I am truly devastated that after waiting years for them to grow up and think for themselves, nothing has changed. I don't believe I was that bad a mother. It seems pointless leaving them my house but I honestly have noone else to leave it too. They don't even want it from what I have heard. I try to be a good person and do the right thing but it always backfires. I have to face the fact I may never see them again. They are 16 and 18 now. I beat myself up all the time of where I went wrong such as not cooking them nice meals, not being fully present etc. How can life be so unforgiving?. Hope the wine improves my mood. Such a dark day.
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