It really does take practice. We’ve wired our brains to only associate relaxation with blackout oblivion. Once you form some new routines, your brain becomes retrained. I like using essential oils for this. Smell is a powerful scent; think about when you smell fresh baked cookies and think of your grandma’s house. Or when you walk into a new place, and a certain smell hits you and brings back associated memories.
Anytime I do anything relaxing, I try to engage all 5 senses in it so my body remembers to connect the relaxing feeling to something healthy. So I take mindful deep breaths, put a few drops of EO on my wrist, or diffuse it in the air. Then a certain taste, like the same special tea that I love. I wear comfy soft clothes or fuzzy socks and make sure the environment around me looks nice. I bought a coffee mug that brings me joy (it’s shaped like a big blue ceramic owl) that I always drink tea in.
You just have to find your thing! Is there anything you used to like to do before drinking? Could you take up a hobby?