You're very welcome, Dee!
& thanks for your helpful thoughts, stargazer. I only saw the Dead a few times -- the last time was 1980. But I was exposed to a lot of the Dead from when I was littler, like 1971 or 72.
My problems are just ch-ch-ch-changes. Rather than going along the path of least resistance, I'm trying to help others do things better, or do better things, sometimes taking the lead. I'm allowing people to have confidence in me. If things continue this way, it's a major shift. It's so different from any other way I've ever done, ever.
I frankly don't know if it's good for me to be extending myself or not. I'm full of worry & fear, but maybe there's stuff to come out of the stress that I can't appreciate yet. Anyway, like with my experience quitting drinking, it seems I'm more compelled than acting from personal will.
Of course, most of my compulsions in the past have ended up badly
But you're right, the dragons in my past don't have to define my future.