I drank to be drunk, everytime. I told myself I was relaxing or having fun, but when everyone else stopped, I didn't. I didn't, because I couldn't. It took 20 years to realise this. I always drank to be drunk, not just a little bit drunk, as drunk as I could possibly get, and then some. That is abnormal behaviour, that impacted negatively on me and those around me, no matter what label you give it, binge drinking, alcohol abuse, alcoholism etc.
I will point out I also didn't drink in the morning for all of 20 years drinking. Then one day the hangover was so bad, I decided to use hair of the dog to take the edge off the anxiety and feeling so low, and then I knew I was getting in deep and not far from physical dependency.
We try not to use the word alcoholic because it has such a cliché stereotype, and in our heads we don't fit that. It also brings such feelings of shame and embarrassment, and it 100% shouldn't. No alcoholic looks the same, or drinks the same, my husband was a different drinker to me back in the day, he drank all the time, a slow slurper, but never drunk. He classed himself an alcoholic, and gave up 30 years ago.
Don't worry about the label, yes I do now class myself as an alcoholic, because I cannot control my action after alcohol has passed my lips, that's the truth of the matter. One sip and all bets are off as to where its taking me. But I don't feel the need to wear a sign declaring it. Only people that need to know, know. The rest I couldn't care less what they think, it takes a strong person to admit they need help. If they cant respect or admire that, that's on them, not me.
Life gets much easier and peaceful without alcohol, believe when people say it. Best of luck