Originally Posted by
biminiblue 
Well, you are ticking all the boxes, my friend.
My inability to predict with 100% certainty exactly how much I would drink on any occasion was pretty scary to me. Since I tried and failed repeatedly at drinking moderately, my decision was to eliminate that problem. Full sobriety is far easier and much more rewarding than drinking or trying to limit my drinking. Anyway, what's the point in one or two drinks? I drank for the buzz.
Blackouts are a good indicator, as well. If you aren't remembering parts of your night, that's a blackout and indicates a progression in the illness/addiction.
I hope you decide to put down the drink permanently. It is far better on the sober side. It doesn't matter what you call it (and boy do we try to sidestep that "alcoholic" label) - if it 's a problem, it's a problem. The solution is to stop applying alcohol.
Yeah, i guess i am trying to side step that particular label! Hopefully ive realised in time and can keep my promise this time, this is the first time i have admitted that alcohol is actually a problem for me, so kind of a eureka moment...
In a strange way i actually feel very positive about the future without alcohol, but only if my wife accepts that i mean it this time and really show her i mean it...I like instant forgiveness and can't seem to cope with the cold shoulder routine,, but maybe i just need to suck it up for a while and prove that im worth keeping around.