Originally Posted by
blueberry2015 
Part of me wants to feel the pain because I dont want to hide from it any more, I don't want to be frightened of it, but the other part of me wants it to run from them and hide, pick up (its been on me recently) but I havent picked up, ive used my tools from the AA programme and sat with it. x
In my experience, painful thoughts (self-pity, resentment, hopelessness, fear, anger etc.) fade more rapidly when I quickly acknowledge the thoughts and decide not to dwell on them, because if I do, the feelings which accompany those thoughts, will grow in intensity and used to culminate in the thought, 'I want a drink'.
I also try to balance out my purposeful thinking with positive thoughts, which generate positive feelings. If my automatic 'thoughts' suddenly crops up with a positive thought or feeling, then I do the opposite of dismissing the original thought and instead, try to concentrate, grow an develop it.
For example, last night, I felt an automatic negative thought and feelings of hopelessness ("why didn't I stop drinking years ago, what a waste, what a fool I was") which I instantly dismissed as my AV and stopped the thoughts/feelings from growing. Seconds later, I looked up at the evening sky and noticed particularly bright stars and constellations. Part of my thoughts expressed awestruckness and my spirits lifted. So I concentrated on those awestruck thoughts and purposefully thought about the majesty of the universe and galaxies and tried to time-extend those positive feelings.