Originally Posted by
Usingthe12 
I just want a chance, ONE CHANCE, to have my family back together again. Whole. With alcohol not being a contributing factor. I'm going to al anon meetings and to therapy. I am trying to work on myself. To recover. Can you understand how I got cheated? How my daughter got cheated? We love this woman to death. She's a terrific mom and wife. When she's sober. Now that sobriety is a real possibility and given the time we all need to heal and recover, isn't it worth a try to have a healed family together again? I think it is.
I'm truly sorry if anything I wrote led you to believe there is no chance. That's not what I intended to convey at all. Your question was whether you were responsible for figuring out what was bothering her and help her to get help.
My response was in regard to "figuring out what was bothering her" and "what caused her to react with alcohol." What was wrong with her was that she was apparently out of control with her drinking. What caused her to react with alcohol is that she has a drinking problem.
As far as deeper issues go, the "why" of going to the alcohol, it could be any number of a hundred things and it's quite possible that
she doesn't know. I certainly didn't.
One more suggestion, yours to accept or reject, naturally. As this is your ex and you are looking for one more chance to get back together with her, perhaps the first step would be to work on reconciling yourself to the divorce and whatever part you may have had in that. Rebuilding can't really begin until you are solidly rooted in the current reality. Her issues are hers to work on and you can't control that. You only have control over you.
Be good to yourself.
O