This is a wonderful forum, full of so much wisdom and support and I am grateful.
Sometimes the truth is hard to hear.
When we start to pull back the blinds of denial, it can be difficult to take in all we begin to see. And difficult to hear what we need to hear. I am someone that welcomes feedback and find that in times of being challenged can bring the greatest growth.
Here I am in one of the most difficult times of my life, full of pain, confusion and chaos. I felt so exposed and raw and I needed to step back, not to run but to reflect and absorb on everything I was hearing. I actually stopped reading on the forum, and left town to visit a girlfriend for a few days. I spent a lot of time walking by myself and reflecting. Getting time away helped.
I wanted to say, I'm back! I started reading more about codependency, this forum and today I started with the question "what do I need today?".
The A in my life is trying to regain footing in my world the last couple days. He has been on a roller coaster and I see no reason to believe it will be different.
So I am staying focused on "what do I need today?", for my business, for my home, for myself. This idea of taking care of myself use to seem selfish and so easy to throw aside if someone wanted or needed something. Today this feels somehow comforting. Today is today and thats all I want to focus on. There is so much to learn and apply. So, my current focus is on detachment and what do I need to take care of myself.
I have a lot to learn and I've only just begun.
Thank you everyone!