Glad to meet you, Bob. You'll find plenty of encouragement & friendship here. For me, it really helped to talk things over with those who understood. No one in my life could comprehend what I was going through - everyone drank socially.
I couldn't imagine my life without the 'enhancement' of alcohol either. Yet if I'd been really honest, the fun was long gone. It was something I did out of habit - & in the end, necessity. I became completely dependent on it to get through the day. 30 yrs. of drinking and reckless behavior - it was time to grow up. It felt strange to be without it in the early days - but I grew to love being free of it & never having to worry about what I said or did. You can do this!