The term Brain Wash could be applicable because rehab and the 12 steps offer a way to cleanse out the old habits by adopting new ones, which include acceptance and asking for help from your higher power. I would rather be cleansed of my demons than stay in them. I am a Mother of a son who has been to rehab a bunch of times. There are times when he doesn't call, and actually I find those times to be good for both of us. Let the process take the time it needs for your fiancé to embrace a whole entirely new way of thinking and acting.