Finally let go, then pulled in again
Relationships are hard. They are extremely hard when you are in college and your partner is a recovering addict. This leads to breaking up... twice... and going separate ways.
I thought I was disattached from my former partner, and in a new, healthy, long term relationship. But then I am told that my former partner has relapsed. I break down and feel an over whelming amount of emotions.
I'm mad at my family members for not telling me immediately. I'm mad at my self for hating my former partner for the last 6 months and causing him pain before. I hate the girl he was with, who relapsed with him. But I cannot be mad at him at all.
Instead, I'm in tears wishing I would of seen the key signs. I wish I would of reached out. I'm crying, because I still care, I still love him.
My new partner does not understand how anyone could love an addict. He does not understand how I could possibly feel this allotment of emotions.
Do I wait and see if my past partner reaches out once he is out of rehab? Do I reach out? Do I just move on and forget about him? As soon as I thought life was getting better, I am dragged back into the past.