After several years of pretty heavy binging, two DUI's, hurting myself accidentally while drunk (including falling face first onto concrete steps, knocking myself out and ending up in the hospital with two skull fractures), and so on, I was getting to the point I would rather be dead. I would wake up in the morning wishing I hadn't. I figured my family and friends would all be better off without me. That scared me, but not enough to quit. I had been attempting moderation for a while when I got DUI number three - running into a parked car in the process. That was it for me. While I was sitting in the police station waiting to be picked up, I had what I can only call a spiritual awakening - I surrendered in a moment and that was the turning point. I called a sober friend and asked for help that night when I got home. I started treatment and going to AA a few days later. I will never drink again and I will never change my mind.