Advice, back away from the ledge...
Hi everyone, glad I stumbled upon this site. Been drinking and drugging my whole life, been to out patient and AA stayed sober for 6 months, that was 18 months ago. Last 2 weeks it has been harder to control and I tell myself every morning this is the day I am going back into a program. I am becoming everything I swore would never be me, and my family is suffering because of it. Tired and depressed everyday. I hate everything about myself, feel totally worthless, paralyzed by fear to make any decision right now. I have this urge to change everything now, and it can only happen by getting and staying sober. I dislike my career path very much, and wish I would care less about appearances and take up a construction job and leave the corporate world until I can figure things out. Just wanting to hear from folks that have been at this very point and what they did to begin moving forward when every decision feels like a wrong one.