First up I need to say kev that I did not want for my closing lines to you to be seen as trivialising. I did not mean them to be, sometimes I make jokes to avoid the real situation at hand. But with all my heart I care about what happens to you and have felt and done precisely as you.
Nands post was great and yes, I've slept with men because I thought it was all I had to offer. I think I have read somewhere that sexual abuse when young can lead to this sort of thinking and behaviour. I know that I became promiscuous following my own 'experience'. Could only see myself as sexual, and this was all that I was worth. I've come to see that this is so not true. Not saying that this has been your experience, but it was true for me.
Just wanted to let you know that like Nands I see red flags, but see nothing wrong with sex at all and I am not a man hater either. I simply think that in the early days it's better to develop friendships and support within AA (anywhere) as sex can make it ever so complicated. It will make for good practice to keep it as support and friendship which in my view far outweighs that of sex. Too easy.
Just wanted to let you know that I hope you did not see me as trivialising. My pathetic closing 'joke' was a "girlie" thing which as a girl I hoped you understood.
This really is a kick arse thread Nands. Talk soon.