Rose,
I think you know I wasn't suggesting you leave. I just wondered where you were in all of that. I sparated emtionally from my family in early recovery and it hurt them but I had to do it to keep my sanity and keep from acting...or reacting...in haste. That sounds like what you are doing...but every once in a while I would get sucked back into their chaos.
Work your program and you may end up just like me...I stay and I have found happiness. My focus is on me and I look for the good in Ward, of which there is alot. I choose to ignor the bad...he drinks too much and is ruining his health in other ways as well. I did some reading about the differances between men and woman...alot of our conflict merely comes from that. Sober or drinking he will NEVER think like me. And you know what? That is not always a bad thing.
Don't beat yourself up...I found myself crying several times when the Beav was at home and tensions built. Just move on...you are doing a great job.
Hugs,
JT