I guess what I am attempting to deal with are the after effects of the relationship. I am also realizing that just as the "A" is not cured by simple abstinence, so is the same for me! Yesterday was a bad day! In trying to understand what happened and trying to acknowledge my part in it I wandered off from my side of the street. Sp just for today I will try to focus on me and what maintains my serenity... any wisdom on moving forward is much appreciated!