Originally Posted by
Giraffegirl2013 
I'm tired of fighting with myself everyday. The last couple of days I have had the overwhelming thought that life isn't worth all the fuss and all I want to do is forget myself. I wish there was a way to get away from myself. I wish there was a way to numb it all so I don't have to feel it anymore.
Congratulations on 2 months! Like you, I struggled to understand how so many people were able to find recovery and not obsess about never being able to drink again. I found that once I stopped fighting and I accepted that alcohol ruins any chance of me having any sort of quality in my life, things began to get a lot easier.
Have you made any changes in your lifestyle since you stopped drinking Giraffegirl? As I'm sure you know, there's no change without change.
Hang in, it will get better if you use the tools and listen to the advice from people here on SR, who have found long term recovery.