TD, don't let her off the hook for anything. And I mean nothing. Addiction or not, she's the mother of your children, and if she needs a concrete reminder of that, let the chips fall where they may. No, you may not actually get what you've a right to, but to forfeit that right in order to make things easier for your ex, or in the hopes of getting some kind of leverage to compel her to start acting like a mom to your kids isn't the way to go, IMHO. She needs to held accountable. Anything less is enabling her escapism.