Perfect
I am an ACOA. I understand. Completely.
Your spouse is not an ACOA.
Sadly, he will probably never be able to completely understand your life. Your story. Your parents.
Although, he does sound like he is a loving, compassionate person. This is a good thing!!!!
My suggestion at this point: continue with the no contact. And just tell him that this is what is best for you at this time.
Because as time goes on, MORE SHALL BE REVEALED.
And then, your spouse might be able to understand you and your family situation.
Hugs to you.
p.s. You might try Alanon or ACOA . (Unfortunately, there are many more Alanon meetings than ACOA meetings. Still, Alanon is a wonderful support resource.)
And Keep Coming Back to this site! It is a great place!!!