Lady, it brought a smile to my face to see your response to our advice/posts/whatever. LOL It's good that you're not trying to 'shift the blame' to the drunk you vs the sober you and realizing that you have to own up to it. As the others have said;we ALL do know and have been through what you're going through. I wish I could have told my judge my dui/car crash wasn't my fault..it was that other guy,the drunk me..that guy so, let sober me off? I don't think that defense strategy would have got me very far.
My ex would ALWAYS use the "I was drunk..I don't remember...I'm so sorry" lines after a blowup.. Sorry's only last for so long and the other person will eventually not take "sorry" anymore. Hang in there and get you a plan together.