Your daughters sounds like they are great people but with flaws and troubles
I am glad that you joined a program. This website has helped me so much!.
I know when my parents adopted me, they knew it was a high risk adoption. The possibility was very well explained that I could inherit many characteristics of my birthmother (disease, alcohol, drugs).
But that is what makes adoptive parents so special. They take that risk. No one TELLS you to adopt a child. You do it, because you want to. You want to help. And your daughter needed help. She needs someone , whether she always admits it or not, to take care of her. She is better of now most likely, rather than being surrounded by drugs and alcohol from the time she was small. ( I do not know how old she was when she was adopted). She is grateful, I am sure. She knows. She may not say.
Last thing is, my brother was adopted just like me. From a different family in a different area. Another high risk adoption case. My parents took the same risk with him, and he is a very bad drug addict (pills especially). It did not show up until 4 years ago. We found out on a family vacation. It was a terrible experience.
I will tell you though, my parents, still deeply deeply love my brother. And to me, that is what is so special. It is easy to love a perfect person. It is NOT easy to love a person who has hurt you. A person you took a large risk with. To me, that makes my parents the best of all. They didn't create their children, instead they decided to help the ones who have a lot to lose. That to me is eternal love. Thats loving the part of the world that can be pretty scary at times.
I have only had ONE conversation with my brother about adoption and I will say, he has told me he loves my Mother and Father very much. But he knows he is different from them. He can feel it in his genes. But he is always grateful, to have parents that offered him a college education, a neighborhood full of friends his age. He knows it is himself he needs to change, he can blame it on his genes. But he cannot blame it on those who adopted him.
Parents have their lifetimes to help their children. For me, the minute I knew my mom saved me from homelessness, it changed my life. I'm sure your daughter is very grateful to have you. No one on this world is perfect. We need all kinds of people. The world would not work properly if everyone in it was perfect.