Hi Phoebe - I do so love your name, it was my grandmother's name and she was one of the kindest people in my life, when I was little.
I am an Adult Child of Alcoholics... hell, the whole fam-damily is addicted.... purebloods, I guess. (grin, that was a joke).
I have been dry for 20 years and married an alcoholic who has been dry for the same amount of time (dry - not drinking, but not working a recovery program). We have 2 kids and both developed addiction in past 2 years.
I have found Alanon, and it saved my life.... no exaggeration. I got very sick worrying about my children, their drug activities, where they were, who they were with, how much they were using/drinking, what were the effects, who knew, who didn't know.... can you see that MY life was all about THEIR addiction?
Yep. And it ruined my life.... with my permission.
I attend Alanon about 3 times a week - in my area there is no Naranon, and all the groups I attend understand that most addicts (not all) are also addicted to booze and the program for those who love them (that would be you and me) is the same.
I post down in the Naranon forum (under Friends and Family) and invite you to stop by and read some of the posts, meet some of the folks and grab a cup of (virtual) coffee.
I hope to see you soon!
BigSis