I would likely have avoided HUNDREDS of relapses if I had stuck with my original plan. I called dozens of friends and my parents at a party on
x-mas about my drinking, and no one said "don't do it", so I drank after 6 months sober and happy. 5 years later, I'm making a strong commitment, but it's ten-fold more difficult when you are constantly taking days, weeks, and months off, just to say "I think I'm normal, but not disciplined enough". It didn't work for me. Now I'm in the clutches of detox again.