Welcome Jenni.
I had a similar pattern. Usually three or four day binges. I lost control after the first drink, which showed I had the phenomenon of craving, a condition that does not occur in non alcoholics. My further problem was that I was unable to not take the fatal first drink. The many good reasons for not drinking were easily pushed aside in favour of the insane ide that this time would be different, after all, I only wanted to have a good time. It seems I was without an effective 24/7 defence against the first drink.
Whether you are like that remains to be seen. You may not have travelled as far down the road as I did. A lot of folks can just make up their minds to stop and that is all here is to it.
But even if you are like me, and discover you have lost the power of choice, it is still possible to recover. It just takes more effort.