Glad you posted.
I'll just comment by sharing what someone said in my AA meeting yesterday: I have learned that I sure don't know everything and [you] might be the one person ever to successfully moderate your drinking, so try it if you feel you need to; in my experience, this brings someone back to the decision that complete sobriety is necessary for them. But maybe you're the exception. Only you can accept that abstinence is the right choice for you.
Take care of yourself.