Originally Posted by
PhoenixJ 
I am, factually one of those few who has crawled back from that ending life abyss. And that I had so little control over what I did or who I even was in that dark place- scares the crap outta me. Thanks.
The ultimate fear- having no control over what you do, what you are and no memory of what you have done. A loss of "self". The end result of an horrendous Faustian sale of oneself into alcoholic slavery. The amazing thing is that anyone manages to return!
W.