Originally Posted by
nileruns 
Your post speaks volumes to me. I'm on day 10 of sobriety. I seem to be past the withdrawal phase, so I'm happy about that. I've managed to keep myself busy, I'm getting a lot done around the house and my performance at work has improved greatly.
However, I still have the same thought process that you mentioned. I don't mean in a moment when my mind is convincing me that I need to drink, I mean when I'm at my most introspective and not even struggling with the desire to get drunk. I spent so many years getting drunk every day I don't even know who I am now. I don't want to be a drunk any more and I'm doing great at remaining sober, but I feel completely lost. I sort of feel as though I just left an abusive spouse. I know I'm doing the right thing and that my life will be better without it, but at the same time it was all I ever knew and I miss it.
I fear this too. I read it takes 21 days to make a new habit. Maybe after some time a new since of norm will set in. I totally remember in the past when I quit for awhile there was a period where I felt sorry for myself because I had to sacrifice something that was part of me. Not a good part, just a big part. It's so.much easier to fall back to drinking because it's what is comfortable, not good, but familiar. Comfortable and familiar aren't always positive words. I hope that you find some new familiarity hang in there and keep me posted I will look forward to hearing your experience and holding onto your strength and using it for myself.