SR,
I know you were asking for advice from long term sober people but I did want to chime in. Ill be 3 months this time around.....
I think abstaining has to become more important to you than anything else. The things we tell ourselves before drinking is what can make or break this situation. If there are thoughts that minimizes drinking or sugar coats the scenario then the same behavior is repeated over and over again and we cant make headway on our mission. If we know what the thoughts are we can stop them in their tracks. Just because the thought arises to drink doesnt mean we have to listen. We can choose to disregard.
For me, I just want to have a better life and to live without the destruction of alcoholism. I know I cannot drink. I knew this while drinking. I cant have it both ways and I refuse to die by a bottle of liquid. So, I know you will find your way into freedom. It may take time but you can do this. We all can.