I am so grateful to everyone who posted. So far I am okay. It really helps that people understand and have even been told similar things. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. I know I can’t drink!
Day 1
I pushed myself to take the chance and face people and did 3 loads of laundry and took 2 trips to recycle and dumpster. I pushed myself out the door for a 2 mile walk. (Thank you Maudcat) 2 showers already. I stink and I know it because I am hurting myself. All I can do is take care today. It is going to be a challenge to get out and not isolate and avoid. There are times its easier and times its almost impossible. Drinking stops the forward motion. It’s easier but only for a very short time.
Spend rest of day facing papers I have put off dealing with and planing week. If I know things are in place and have a plan I will do better. I guess I need to face the things that weigh heaviest.
SimplyFree, thats it no big crash, but I too can see it coming.
I will never have a normal life and learn to face my fears if I drink.
So for now I will challenge the Paper Pile.
Though I don't desire to drink now it will sneak up on me. I guess this scares me and though I fight severe anxiety and panic. This one is real!