It looks like some of my post disappeared. I wanted to say
FBL, thanks for sharing about your brother. My brother has some similar issues, but alas, I've been harboring a resentment against him for many years and haven't shown the sympathy I maybe should. I hope your brother finds some peace, and I'm glad that he has you.
((Deliza)) you really have a lot to handle. I'm sorry for your troubles. I agree w/Carlos about seeking outside help. Definitely get an appointment with the lawyer, and also maybe you can arrange coffee w/someone in AA other than your sponsor? Not to talk in deep confidence, but to get some perspective from a person who seems to have good recovery.
Also, if I were you, I'd back off that person you give rides to. You really have enough on your plate. However, that's me, Ms. Back-off.
You might try to make a list of all the problems you wrote about and categorizing them as Feelings (like resentments), Real Things, and Things-that-might-Happen. And then make action steps for each. It might help?