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Old 05-03-2017, 07:02 AM
  # 13 (permalink)  
Fusion
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 2,654
Fini, before I made my Big Plan, I spent countless hours reading about AVRT, on the back of year upon year in recovery groups, and many years learning about the mechanism of addiction and the brain, CBT, REBT etc., all to no avail.

AVRT stuck an internal deep seated chord. I attempted to stop drinking for over twenty years - so there was a part of me that wanted to stop - yet clearly a part that didn't want to stop, because I still drank.

I believe the internal chord struck, was my conscience, wisdom, true-self, as they related to morality. I reflected on all negative impacts upon my life and others, of my continued drinking, and finally reached the conclusion that it was wrong behaviour to continue drinking.

Therefore, when I made my Big Plan, not drinking became part of my own personal moral code. Anything that tried to encourage me to breach that moral code (thoughts, feelings, imagery, cravings, urges etc.) were immediately identified as the Beast's AV, and not ME with my BP and permanent non-drinking status. I suppose, if me and my BP are my determined moral code - then the Beast and ITs AV are immoral: but as you state, that's not true, because the Beast is a metaphor for that part of my brain that has become a drive for alcohol, an automatic, habituated part with no morality, logic or reasoning. Evidenced by the fact that, unchecked or stopped, it would've led me to drink myself to death.

The beauty of this technique, is that effectively it doesn't only place the power to recognise and dismiss AV, firmly in my hands (neo-cortex) but also into the hands of my moral conscience. Now that I don't intoxicate myself, I believe my moral conscience is on automatic duty no matter what, no matter how depleted my neo-cortex may be due to HALT - there stands my automatic moral conscience, as a sentinel to the arising AV. It's quite ingenious, I have self-will and conscience and thereby all the power - whereas the Beast has no power, whatsoever, all IT can do is bark away, inconsequentially.

By making a BP, I added not drinking alcohol to my moral code, along with the pre-existing behaviours which I never engage in.

Although AVRT is simple, it's not easy in so far that, for it to be effective and permanent (my Big Plan) I had to decide to stop drinking, forever, no ifs, buts, possibilities, conditions, contingencies, slips or relapses. No more drinking - that was a crazy, scary idea, despite everything I'd lost to drink. That was the hard part. Once drinking was off the table forever, post BP, recognising and immediately dismissing the AV, was easy.
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