I hear you MsCooterBrown, it can be a bit lonesome. I keep turning down invites out because they all seem to be so drinking focused. Today I've turned down 2 social gatherings. The first is a family thing where all the family will be getting together to discuss my ailing grandmother. I would like to be there for the conversation and I was going to go when I thought it was going to be in a restaurant but they've changed it to a house so they can order in and drink...... lots of alkies in my family so it's not surprising. My mom is ground zero for my addiction and I just can't, I won't. So I'm going to go up during the week (it's a long drive) to see my granny in the hospital and then sit down for lunch with my mom.
The other is a bbq at my best friends house where it will be nothing more than everyone sitting around drinking beers and shooting the $hit. She wants me to come to talk wedding stuff as she's getting married next weekend.... again on some level I know I should go there and be involved but I don't want to hang out watching everyone get loaded. I just don't want to do it. So instead I'm going out shopping with her tomorrow and she will be dying from a hangover and not the best of company.
For so many people socializing is centered around drinking and I'm not sure where I fit in anymore. I'm ok with not going and totally solid in my decision to never poison myself with alcohol ever again. I know I'm not missing anything..... I hated waking up sick and regretful and having to apologize for fighting with my bf or offending someone with some stupid thing I'd said or done. I'm finding that I'm much more of a morning person and day time activities are the way I'd prefer to spend my time. Spending my evening home just reading a book or watching a movie or goofing around with my new hobby of butchering music on my guitar is fine by me. I do get a bit lonesome though. I wish I knew sober people to hang out with, I surrounded myself with people who wouldn't judge me for how I used to drink and I haven't found any new friends. Yet. I'm sure I will.