Thanks for your replies. Tight would be an understatement, financially devastated by all this is closer to the case. He talks about finding a job (this has been a 3 year discussion) just limited action to make it happen.
Just doing everything I can everyday to keep my 4 kids in their school (private) they have been in for years and try and stay in our house in the short term at least for the kids. Its the only thing that's had been stable and their safe place right now. In the last year there has been IOP, AA, 40 day inpatient, relapse after relapse and currently he doesn't live in the house after "the final straw" of another incident of putting the kids in danger and a major episode.
I read on SR a lot and many of your stories give me hope for him and that my kids will have the dad they deserve..just not sure all the collateral damage can be repaired for us. Best of luck to everyone!