I understand what you are feeling.
I to have returned to my church after being away for nearly 40 years and it is a tough transition. I have met with a priest so my wife and I can get remarried in the church. Going to mass has been stressful and after living without God for so long it sometimes feels odd to go.
I have had so many influences over the years saying that God isn't real and religion is a money making scam; it bothers me that I do not trust my faith more.