Originally Posted by
DonnaNix 
Hi,
At times I feel so much guilt and horror at what I've become and tell myself I need to quit for good, then the next day I'll not care and buy a bottle of vodka.
Hi. Been here before, I think we all have. I got to the point I didn't want to even go to the beer distributor but I went from force of habit. Eventually I said heck with all of that after many years. I added up the cash I was throwing down the toilet which sickened me and told myself whatever comes my way I will deal with sober instead of medicating with alcohol. So far so good at almost 4 months. Although this isn't my first sober rodeo I don't desire to fall back into my own alcoholic mess this time, I just don't feel like dealing with it anymore.