(((((((Trina)))))))) First of all, take it easy on yourself, hon'. Everything about quitting drugs and alcohol is scary, unfamiliar, overwhelming, etc.....but you can get through it. Just take it one moment, one emotion, one thought, one craving at a time. All you can control is right now, this minute, and you don't have to have a drink or drug right now, right? We are here for you.....
As far as the meetings go, I won't try to force you to go, but I really think you might be really glad you did. NO ONE there will look down on you for being there and no one who isn't there needs to know you went. If nothing else, you might look up AA in your local phone book and give them a call. When you reach someone (sometimes the number is just an answering service and someone will call you back) just tell them what you have said here and see what they say. I KNOW it is scary, but so is drinking or drugging yourself to death.
I am glad you posted again. Keep hanging in there.
Hugs--