Day 81
Thank you Ina for noticing I had forgotten to update my day count. Now the world is in in order again and I am back to being 1 day-count ahead. - No wonder people often stop counting days after 3 months, it is tough keeping track !
Hi Mr. M. I occasionally think about the what-if's : I hadn't spent so much money/time/talent/energy while drinking. Thinking "what-if " has been motivational, if I get week or feel I am loosing my way I sometimes think that way, but it depresses me too much. For me, focusing on the years ahead, and what I still might be able to achieve, through change and good decision making, feels constructive and happy. I think one of us on this thread refers to the past as being a like a monster. I can certainly visualise it that way.
I know I have seen real long-term change in my relationships with a few loved ones. If asked, none of them would ever want the relationship or me to go back to what it was like before. I am sure many are afraid it might do, as they like it now so much. They, like I, have invested so much getting to know each other in 2017. I wont go back to that life now. This is happening. I am shocked how selfish I was before.
On a more positive note, as it is morning, and I am drinking my first coffee, reading my classmates posts about their sobriety and reflecting on my own. This is such a great journey so far. Starting my day like this, feeling grateful for just being sober and setting achievable goals for the day has been a revelation. I have SR and you guys to largely thank for that.
Have a happy, sober and rewarding Wednesday Januarians . One more day.